Time to Move On…From Preaching
Based on my age and church involvement, I’ve probably heard over 1000 sermons in my lifetime, and I can’t remember a single point from any of them. In the moment or even a few days afterward, I could remember something but those memories are gone now, because those sermons, as good, inspiring, and influential as they might have been, were not formational.
I have an experiment for you to try. Spend 15-20 minutes writing down your Top 10 most spiritually formational moments or experiences from your life.
How many of your formational experiences involved a 30 minute monologue speech or sermon?
My Top 10 list includes: conversations, relationships, and experiences. No sermons on the list.
A conversation with my Mom in our family kitchen when I was a teenager and she shared her favorite verse with me
A conversation with my wife in which she shared, “I sense God is wanting more from us.” Actually, well over half my Top 10 are conversations or experiences with my wife.
My wife and I saved for years to travel to Italy and our first trip there together, we went to Saturnia, and I climbed up this little waterfall at the hot springs there, and had a very powerful solitude moment with God.
A few years ago, Karrie and I went through an exercise at Kineo Center and it was very healing for me.
God brought two men into my life in 2015 - 2017 (Eric and Yale), who basically kept me afloat spiritually. They were my shepherds through the darkest years of my life.
It’s time to move on from the monologue sermon because it’s not a formational experience, unless it becomes more conversational and relational.
Whether you are preaching from a stage, leading a small group, or having a coffee meeting with one other person, here are some important habits, quotes, and research to consider:
Questions are more formational than statements.
“Whatever we are told, we often resist. Whatever we discover, we are more likely to embrace.” - Terry Walling
“Gentle questions must supersede domineering assertions.” - Stuart Murray
“Jesus used rabbinic teaching methods that were less performative and more interactive…more questions proceed from Jesus mouth than answers.” - Dan White Jr.
Train people how to lead conversations, ask good questions, listen attentively with empathy. Whether you’re preaching or having a conversation, remember that questions and listening often lead to the discoveries that are spiritually formational.
If you’re preaching, a simple change to make is to substitute questions for statements and build in time for people to ponder, make notes, and even respond. Planned silence in a sermon can be a powerful formational tool.
Dialogue is critical.
“According to the National Training Laboratory, people only remember about 5% to 10% of a lecture or monologue and the retention rate plummets down to 1% when tested. But nearly 50% to 75% is retained if dialogue is included simultaneously.” - Dan White Jr.
This is where I lose most pastors. They can’t fathom releasing control and letting people actually respond to what they are sharing. And their caution is legit. We’ve probably all been to an open mic situation that went off the rails. But it’s possible to lead a guided dialogue in the midst of a large public gathering. And when properly led, it’s a profound formational experience.
Leading a dinner table conversation or a one-on-one coffee meeting requires the same set of skills.
Churches can and should train people on how to lead formational conversations. To have the most impact, this should be modeled on Sunday mornings during the sermon.
Relationships are more formational than beliefs. Churches spend way too much time teaching and sharing beliefs. In addition to moving on from the monologue sermon, churches should also move on from membership classes. Making people subscribe to a bullet point set of beliefs before they can belong to the community is absurd. It’s the complete opposite of how Christ discipled people.
We need to utilize most of our time together as a church community building around relationships and teaching people how to build and maintain healthy relationships. This will move the church from consumers to disciples.
“The law of entanglement in quantum physics states that relationship is the defining characteristic of everything in space and time…everyone is linked and we all affect each other…your intentions, your prayers, and your words toward others will have impact because of this law.” - Dr. Caroline Leaf, Communication Pathologist, author of Switch On Your Brain: The Key to Peak Happiness, Thinking, and Health
Others can only hear you when they are moving toward you, no matter how eloquently you phrase the message.” - Rabbi and Therapist, Dr. Edwin H. Friedman
“We are transformed by who we love more than what we believe. Transformation comes when our mind goes beyond correcting our beliefs to practicing attachment love. Our brain is built, maintained, and transformed by attachment love.” - Clinical Psychologist, Seminary Professor, Jim Wilder
If you’re a pastor or church that wants to experiment with this, get in touch. In the meantime, here are some resources:
http://danwhitejr.com/books/dialogical-preaching (great book on conversational preaching and will only take you about 15 minutes to read)
The church we planted, Restore Church, built our own Conversational Preaching Guide and I’m happy to share it for free if you want a copy.